The Jokes on Seph
by SpazticlySane
Summary: Seph is getting busted in some pretty weird situations..... Other characters will be in this! Contains swearing and maybe some smut, you have been warned!
1. The Jokes on Seph

SEPHY IN TROUBLE

"Zack!! ZACK!!" Sephiroth screamed his friends name at the top of his lungs, hoping the dark haired youth would hear him.

_Just my luck…_Sephiroth mumbled to himself. _I get stuck up in my room where no one can hear and the scariest thing I have ever seen is at me feet. Good thing this lamp is so high…_Sephiroth sighed. He could just tell it was going to be a long day….

Zack skipped (yes skipped!) along the footpath. He was in an incredibly good mood, as he always is. "I wonder where Sephy is today?" Zack looked around, expecting the famous general to appear out of nowhere, but all he saw was Genesis sitting under a tree, no doubt reading Loveless for the millionth time. "Hmmm.." A smirk crossed Zack's face, as he quietly snuck up behind the redhead, intent on scaring the absolute shit out of him. "ZACK!!" "ARRRGGHHH!!!" Zack fell backwards as Genesis turned and yelled in his face. Slowly picking himself up, Zack turned to look at Genesis who was lying on the ground attempting to breath and laugh at the same time. "I hope you die.." Zack grumbled to him. "You… You… You should have… Seen… Your face!" Zack laughed as Genesis did the most pathetic impression ever.

"Hey, you seen Seph at all today?" Zack asked. Genesis shrugged with a purely evil grin on his face, "I expect he would be stuck in his room…" That's when both SOLDIERs turned there heads to the scream coming form Sephiroth's apartment, "GENESIS!!!!" At the sound of his name, Genesis burst into laughter as Zack sprinted to his troubled friend.

"Seph!! SEPH!! What is it? Whats happened?" Zack burst into the room desperately looking around, only to see Sephiroth clutching for dear life on a lamp post. "Get that fucking thing away from ME!!" As he pointed to the offending thing on the ground at his feet. Zack just laughed as he laid eyes on the cutest puppy he had ever seen.


	2. Sephy in Love

Sephy in Love

Zack was worried. Worried for Sephiroths sanity. _That man needs to get out more. _He thought to himself as he walked to the famous generals apartment. He had heard earlier that day, that the general had locked himself in his room and refused to leave and refused anyone to come. Anti-social much?

Zack slowed as he reached the corner and peaked around. "Damn…" He mumbled to himself, but staunted out like he had never been there, least Sephiroth's secretary could call the security before he even made an excuse.

"Hey! How you going…" "Get lost Zack." "Angela! You cut me so deep!" "Yeh, whatever, but I have specific orders to make sure you don't get in there." Angela said as she pointed towards Sephiroth's door. "I only want…" "No!" "Geez calm down, I'm going…" Zack sulked as he walked away. _Plan A out the window then…_ Zack sighed, unfortunately Plan A was the only plan he had. "Wait a minute! Out the window…" A purely devious smile made its way across Zack's face, one that he knew wouldn't fail him, he hoped.

_This is the most stupidest idea ever! _Zack mentally kicked himself for the one hundredth time that day as he looked down to the ground below him. _Atleast I would make a pretty stain if I fell… _Zack laughed to himself and continued to climb up and across to his friends window.

Finally clambering through his friends window, Zack looked around for the heaps anti-social one. "Seph?" Zack walked around the bedroom, which was empty, the bathroom and living room had the same result, so that only left one more place…

As Zack walked into the kitchen his eyes widened as he found Sephiroth. "Seph?" Sephiroth turned at the sound of his name and Zack nearly fell over. _Are they actual love hearts in his eyes?_ Zack pondered. "Zack… Isn't she beautiful?" Sephiroth moved out of the way to reveal the newest and improved Pantene Pro V 2 in 1 Shampoo and Conditioner….


	3. 2nd Date

Second Date

Genesis sat at the wooden table, opposite from his newest company and studied her closely. _Not bad, _he thought to himself. _Tall, brown eyes, brown hair and the nicest rack I've ever seen…_

"Hi" Genesis said as he leaned over the table with his hand out. "My name is Genesis." Hoping to god she wouldn't squeal like one of those stupid fan girls. "Hi" She replied shaking his hand. "My name is Julie." "It's very nice to meet you Julie." Genesis drawled as he kissed the back of her hand gently. Julie smiled and sat down again. She was still getting over the initial shock that she was here with the well known commander.

"may I take your order?" Genesis was pulled out of his thoughts as the waiter spoke. "Ah, yes, thank you. I would like a plate of salad and a bottle of your finest white wine and for the lady…?" Genesis smiled at her sweetly. "I'll just have a salad to thanks." Julie smiled at the waiter as he walked away and sneaked a look at Genesis. _God he's hot!_ Her mind screamed at her. _He's so clean and precise and… and he's staring at the waiter's ass! _"Are you staring at his ass?" Julie demanded. "Yes, actually I was, I was just thinking…" Genesis stopped mid sentence as the waiter came back with the bottle of wine. "your salad will be arriving shortly." The waiter announced and turned on his heel and walked away. "Where was I…" Genesis said slightly out of it. "Oh yeh! I was just thinking that, if I cut that waiter off waist down and stuck it on you, that's be my fantasy come true! Because he has a nice looking ass and whatever package he had round the front, and I'd have your awesome rank around the front!" Genesis leaned back and smiled, utterly pleased with himself.

_SMACK!!! _Genesis snapped his eyes open to the sudden pain exploding on his cheek to see Julie walking out with the bottle of wine in hand. _I wanted that wine…_ Genesis mumbled to himself. "I guess this means there's no second date then?" He called out to her.

_SMASH!!_ All Genesis saw was the bottle come flying through the air and shatter on his head and chest. _Hmph…That's gunna leave a bruise. I'll have to remember that women are incredibly good shots with wine bottles…_


	4. Birthday Present

Birthday Present

Cloud was nervous. No, he was excitedly nervous. It was his birthday today and he had the slightest idea of what Genesis, his boyfriend of 1 year, had gotten him. Although he didn't even want to begin to think what Zack and Sephiroth had gotten him, no doubt it would be something crazy, or rude, or maybe he might actually get something he could use. Cloud sighed… Only time would tell.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR CLOUD!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!"

"Zack!" Cloud said, "Could you get any louder?" " Yes, I could! Do you want me to?" "NO!!" Sephiroth answered. "Your earlier singing was quite enough for my poor ears thank you"

"Well, now that we've sung happy birthday, can we eat the cake?" "No Genesis, we cant" Zack said matter-of-factly. "Me and Seph have one more present to give the birthday boy" Cloud gave his friend a quizzical look as he took the present from Zack, completely missing the evil smile plastered on his face.

"I hope pink suits him" Sephiroth whispered into Zacks ear. "Me too!" Zack replied while barely holding back his fit of giggles.

As Cloud slowly opened the present, Sephiroth keep a close eye on Genesis's, knowing how protective the man was of his lover, plus, he was also dying to see his reaction.

Zack could barely keep his face straight as Cloud delicately lifted up the pink leather thong, and read the note attached to it: _Dear Cloud, I actually got you something you can use this year, and I bet by the time you finish reading this note, you will have gone a brighter shade of pink than your new…Clothing. Love Zack and Seph xx_

"You know what the best part is?" Zack said, "you can use it tonight!!" The grin on Zack and Sephiroth's face's were pure evil and they bolted out of the room laughing their heads off.

"They are going to die in the most painful way I can think of." Genesis threatened as he picked up his sword and followed the sound of side splitting laughter.


	5. Zack Facts

**Zack Facts**

Angeal sighed. He was really starting to get sick of the constant arguing between his to best friends; Sephiroth and Genesis.

Angeal glanced sideways at his student, Zack, who seemed to be incredibly amused and was actually sitting still for once.

"You used my teaspoon!" "Genesis, it is just a freakin teaspoon! I will buy you a new one if you want." "It's not just a teaspoon, its MY teaspoon! And you fucking used it without asking me!" "Oh! So I have to ask you permission to use a goddamn teaspoon?" "Yes I would like that!" "Well you can just get over yourself, because I'm not going to!" "Why you…" "Hey guys!" Angeal froze at the sound of his students voice and watched his friends' reactions as they both turned their heads to glare at Zack. "I am Switzerland!" "What the fuck?" Genesis said as he turned on his heel and left.

* * *

Zack sat on the couch with a grin on his face. Sephiroth and Genesis were arguing… AGAIN "You used my shampoo!" "No I didn't!" Yes you did you liar! I can smell it in your hair!" Both men paused to take a breath and Zack jumped at his chance. "Do you know what happens to a cat when you run over it heaps and heaps of times? No? Well, it gets flatter." Zack smiled proudly and only just managed to dodge out of the way and a book came flying at his face.

* * *

Angeal looked up as his door opened to reveal a mumbling and whining Zack, with a very interesting mark on his head. "Zack, what happened?" "Seph smacked me across the head a spatula." "And why would he do that?" "I don't know, I was just trying to lighten the mood, because Seph and Gen were arguing again, so I started talking about all the ice cream flavours I've had in my life, then SMACK!!! I got this imprint plastered to my head." Angeal tried not to laugh.


	6. Blackmail

**I will try and update more, it just kinda sucks now that school is back on… -.-Tell me what you think! And I'm open to suggestions or ideas!**

* * *

Blackmail

"Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Reno! Stop fucking laughing and run!! If Seph catches us were screwed!" Zack jokingly shoved Reno to the side as the red head burst into another round of laughter. Finally pulling himself together, Reno set his mind to one thing and one thing only; _Get the fuck away from Sephiroth and fast! _Another round of laughter threatened to erupt from his mouth as he remembered what he and Zack had busted the 'manly' general doing on camera.

~ 5 MINS EARLIER~

"Reno get your ass out of my face!" "You like staring at my face yo! Just admit it" "I'm gunna beat the shit out of you…" "Yeh, yeh you always say that man, think of something new. Besides SOLDIER boy, you can't even catch me!" "Bullshit!…" "Shut up! He's coming!"

The two boys, who were sitting in Sephiroth's air vent with a camera, held their breaths. If they got busted now… Sephiroth walked through the door and strolled into his bedroom. And stayed there. For ages. "Fuck man…" Reno whispered, "20mins later!" He looked at Zack, who held up two fingers to his head in the shape of a gun.

Reno forced himself not to laugh as he caught sight of Seph walking into the room wearing baggy pants and a loose fitting t-shirt as he casually walked to a pile of pillows right beneath them. Reno carefully switched on the video camera and angled it at Seph.

Zacks eyes widened as Seph put down a number of sparkly, flowery, butterfly and pretty clips and looked at Reno who was crying at the effort of not laughing. Both of them watched with amusement as Seph started to braid his hair, placing the clips in the most perfectly arranged places.

Reno and Zack could hardly breath as their bodies shook with suppressed laughter at the 'manly' general below them.

Sephiroth who had finally finished braiding his hair picked up the mirror at his feet and looked at his work. "Yes Seph, you do have amazing hair when it is braided. Better than that Lara Croft chick anyway" Sephiroth said out loud.

That's when Sephiroth noticed the red light on the camera above him and could just make out to people in the dark.

Zack and Reno, who were practically dead from holding back laughter, looked back at the general…. Only to find him glaring angrily up at them.

"oh fuck man…" Reno said through breaths. He looked at Zack, whose face literally said run.

~PRESENT MOMENT~

"GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHITS!!" Reno and Zack being the smart people they are, ran faster.

"Left here man, there should be an air vent we can jump up into." Zack followed Reno's instructions and pulled the air vent off and launched himself up. Tossing the camera up to Zack, Reno jumped up himself.

"Thanks for the blackmail yo!" Reno cackled as Seph rounded the corner just in time to see Reno's bright red hair disappear . It didn't mean he couldn't hear the pairs uncontrolled laughter as he glared up at them and as he stalked away. Their laughter ringing in his head.

"Omg man…." Zack barley got out as he struggled to breath. Looking up at his partner in crime, Zack knew Reno had already got something in mind.

"Now…" Reno said, eyes glittering mischievously, "for phase two…"


	7. Saints or Sinners?

**AN:**

**I do not own anything! Unfortunately…. Everything here is purely made up!**

Saints or Sinners?

"I cant believe this! I cant understand Tseng being all angry n shit at you partner, but im a fucking angel! Why would he do this to me…?" Rude sighed and shook his head at his crap talking friend. _Reno, an angel…? Yeh fucking right. _Looking back at his partner, Rude couldn't help but think that his ego couldn't possibly get any bigger, but stopped short as two girls walked past, each fluttering their eyelashes at the redhead as he immediately turned on his 'Reno charm'. "Reno!" Rude called as he motioned to the chopper near by. Reno didn't even glance back at the girls as he walked off which was uncharacteristic of him. Rude raised an eyebrow, silently asking his question. "Fake boobs man, both of them. There no good when there not real." Reno grinned and climbed into the chopper, with Rude right behind him.

Reno miserably jumped down from the chopper, an unreadable expression on his face as he stared at the pavement as he and Rude walked to the newly built Catholic School.

"I can't believe where doing this yo… Its so pathetically un-cool…" "Reno, just put up with it, it could be two weeks not one." "Yeh yeh I guess" Reno sighed again as he pushed the doors open to the building and his impending doom.

"Hello, you must be the boys that are going to be working as the P.E teachers, yes? My name is Lionette, But you will refer to me as Miss. Grasspot." Reno sniggered under his breath. "Yes we are, and we are MEN not BOYS" Reno shook her head at the ridiculous comment. _Me not a man..? Pfft, well Rude is a man, im more like an immature man.. _Reno grinned and was brought out of his own world and managed to catch the last couple of words of what 'Miss. Grasspot' had just said. "Im sorry could you please repeat that?" Reno looked at the woman innocently. "Hmm, what I just said was is to please refrain yourselves from swearing, bringing up drug use, hell or anything sexually orientated, if you do, I will be forced to remove you from this program. Very well, since you are not speaking or have an objection to that, I will see you tomorrow morning at 8."

I can't believe this……. Im going to go crazy! She's basically saying im not allowed to breath…Hmph" Reno sat in complete silence, contemplating his situation. What nerve that Miss. Grasspot had.. _Hah! I bet she smokes it too! _

Wait…. What had she said about being kicked out if we do……. A purely evil smile crossed Reno's face as he planned his every move and remark for tomorrow. Poor Rude's face actually went pale as he noticed the evil glint in Reno's eyes, and hoped to every god he could think of, that whatever Reno was planning, that he would not unleash it on him.

Reno swaggered into the school the next morning with Rude. His unkempt hair falling over his face. "My gosh! You could have made yourself presentable.." _Great… _Reno thought, as he took in Miss. Grasspot disgusted face. _Just what I need this fucking early in the morning _" You could have smoked some this morning to put you in a better mood…." Reno mumbled under his breath. Miss. Grasspot stilled, a look of shock covering her face, and Rude elbowed Reno in the ribs. "Im sorry Miss, please continue" Rude said politely and abruptly followed the woman down the hall.

"Now class, these are your sport teachers, for the time before we can get someone else in. Behave yourselves, as god is always watching over you." All the children looked up to the ceiling, each muttering "amen". Reno smirked, he couldn't wait to corrupt all these innocent little kiddies!

"Ok everyone, my name is Rude and this is Reno, and we will be teaching you for a week." A million questions were all asked at the one time, causing Rude to take an involuntary step back. "Ok! Morsels! Well I should actually say little people, but back off with the questions yo! Now, how old are you guys?" There was a chorus of answers from everywhere, but Reno got a rough idea that they were dealing with eight to ten year olds… _Good…_He thought_ So much more easily corrupted_.

"Excuse me, but are you going to go to heaven?" Reno looked down at the cute little blonde girl as she looked up at him with adorable brown eyes. "No im going to hell" The room went dead quiet. As every child in the room focused their eyes on Reno. "Why not?" Came the whispered question. " Sexiness like mine isn't allowed in heaven, coz god is a jealous prick… so he's sending me to hell!" Reno grinned at the shocked faces. "Better get used to it guys, god doesn't fuckin love everyone yo." He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out his packet of smokes, quickly lighting one up. "What is that?" _Ahh… Let the innocent questions begin_ "This? This my friend is a smoke. It is a drug. It is bad for you. But it is really fucking good." "Reno!.." Rude hissed through his teeth. He could see what his partner was doing now: Breaking rules. Something he was VERY good at.

**~3 DAYS LATER~**

"What the fuck happened next?" "What happened next you ask? I fuckin nailed that bitch good yo! Then I kicked her mother fuckin' boyfriends ass to kingdom come! She was good to! She rode real hard to, just the way I like it! I guess that must have been the affects of the dope we smoked but you know, that's what makes it fun!" Rude looked away in shame, knowing there was no hope for the kids now. Reno had used every swear word he could think of and more, put a VERY graphic image of himself screwing some chick in their minds, told them what drugs they should or shouldn't use and that hell was better than heaven because there were hot chicks there, with REAL boobs and hot guys, AND the kids were all swearing like they had been doing it there whole lives. They were going to be in A LOT of trouble.

"O children! How are you all behaving….." Miss. Grasspot froze. Quickly taking in the scene of Reno smoking in the school building, and smoking in front of the children! "Hi Miss. Grasspot! Have you smoked any of that fuckin good weed yet?" "Yeh, Reno said its lots of fun and that you can nails bitches when your fucking high on the shit!" "He also said that hell is awesome coz there are hot guys there!"

Miss. Grasspot dropped to the floor in an unconscious heaps.

"Oh good your finally awake! I take it were not welcome here anymore?" "No your not. Get out!" "What?" Reno plastered a look of hurt on his face "But me and the kids were getting along really well! I taught them a whole new language!"

"GET OUT OF MY SCHOOL!" "Ok, ok calm down, don't get that moist dope of your in a knot, were leaving right now. I just have one question. What do you think of the kids now?" Miss. Grasspot looked out the window, yelling out expletives of every colour and mimicking crude actions that Reno must have taught them. "Tell me, do you think there saints or sinners now?" Reno burst into an evil laugh, as he swaggered out of the building. With Rude close behind him, looking very ashamed.

"My work here is done!" Reno stated as he clapped his hands together and jumped into the chopper, looking very pleased with his work.

**AN: If I offended anyone in this story, due to there religion or views, I am very sorry and didn't mean it, I was only trying to write Reno's character properly. Again I am very sorry if I offended anyone, and if asked, I will take this chapter down. But besides that, I hope you liked it! And I will try to update more often, but school gets pretty hectic sometimes… meh….**

**Review's are always loved! **


	8. BONK

BONK

**Need to update more often… sorry, school is NOT co-operating**

**Got this idea from something that happened at school (I guess it is good for something xD) between me and my friend, I thought it would be good to make into a story, if you don't like it, I don't care, just don't comment, if you like it, please comment and you get a big thumbs up! **

"BONK! BONK BONK BONK BONK BONK!"

"Zack, exactly how much sugar did you give him?" " A bit too much I think…" Zack and Angeal stood just insides Sephiroths doorway, watching the normally controlled general bouncing, running, climbing and skipping over everything he could possibly reach.

Angeal sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose as he looked at the ground, as if it held some answer for him. "BONK!" "Shit! I… I mean crap…" Angeal visibly flinched as Sephiroth scared him, his expletives naturally coming out of his mouth. Angeal cast a guilty sideways glance at his student, wondering if he had heard the foul language. "Yes, Angeal, he heard those disgraceful words erupt from your mouth with Sephiroth scared you. It's not like he hasn't heard worse and it's not like he doesn't hang around with me at all…" Genesis flounced into the room, his red trench coat fluttering behind him. Sephiroth, who had noticed the new comer arrive, bounded forward to pick Genesis up, off the ground and hug him. "BONK!" "Yes hello Seph, put me the fuck down now before I burn you…" Sephiroth ungraciously dropped Genesis on his ass, before climbing over the couch, coming to the conclusion that it was much more interesting than the abrasive auburn.

"What type of noise is that anyway?" Angeal asked, desperately trying to make sense of his friends' odd behaviour.

"He's making a frog noise"

"A what…?" "A frog noise" Zack repeated happily. "It's a type of noise a frog makes" "Zack…" Angeal begun, "Show me exactly what Sephiroth has eaten."

15 packets of chocolate, 10 packets of mixed sour lollies, 2 ice cream containers, 10 cans of coke, 2 bottles of creamy soda, 6 packets of Wiz Fiz and 1 huge sugar high later, Angeal and Genesis could finally see why Seph was quiet literally bouncing off the walls.

"Zack…" Genesis said with dread. "I have one question" "And that would be…?" "Why is there double of everything?" "Oh, that's easy, I helped Seph eat some of it" Zack stated matter of factly, with a grin on his face.

"Well thank the goddess you don't become like.." "BONK!" Angeal's shoulders drooped as he watching his crazy student run around the room with the silver general, every bit as high on sugar as his best friend.

"BONK BONK BONK" "BONK BONK BONK BONKONK!…." Zack and Sephiroth feel silent as they both looked at each other, wondering what the heck type of noise each other was making, before falling into bouts of laughter.

"Angeal…" Genesis whispered " I think we need to back away slowly…" "Good idea"

Quietly leaving the room and clicking the door shut behind them, both their faces paled as they heard the unmistakable crash of glass…

"I hope that wasn't Zack attempting to fly again…."


	9. Drunken Rant

**Drunken Rant**

**This idea actually came to me when I got a chain text msg, I just changed it a little. Hope you like!**

Rude visibly watched his partner sway as he walked down to his office, noticing the tired look on Reno's face only added to his amusement.

"Big weekend?" Rude innocently asked, only just hiding his smile.

"You have no fucking idea yo…." Reno answered as he flopped to the ground, either to tired to move or that he just couldn't be bothered walking to a chair.

"Rude I've finished all my reports for the week and I'm taking them to Tseng now, do you want me to take yours? Is Reno here yet? Ahh, yes, he is, good, Rufus wants to have meeting with all of us in Tseng's office and…" Elena quietened as she caught sight of Reno. "He looks like shit!" Elena whispered in Rude's direction.

"I can fucking hear you yo!" Elena jumped and Rude smiled, realizing Elena had actually thought Reno was asleep on the floor. Reno might be sloppy but he had standards for the place's he slept, well at least he does when he's sober. Rude's smile turned into a full grin.

"Get that look off your face yo. I know exactly what your thinking' bout so don't even go there, especially with Laney in the room."

"But it was so funny, the way you tried to kick that guys ass with a bottle of milk and.."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Came the muffled abuse from the floor. "I like you better when you don't talk partner, and even though I may look like shit, as Elena so kindly put it, I promise you I can still make your life hell." Reno lifted his head up off the floor and rolled onto his back, while raising his finger at Rude. "I know where you live yo!" Reno threatened.

Rude closed his mouth, knowing, even due to the state he was in, Reno would make good on his promise.

"Rude, Elena, ahh… I see you've finally decided to grace us with your presence Reno. All of you in my office now please. And Reno, don't complain, I have those soft couches back." "Fuck you Tseng…" Reno murmured as he picked himself up off the floor, knowing that comfy couches awaited him.

"Are couches your only motive?" Elena asked him.

"Yep, pretty much. Ya gotta do whatcha gotta do Laney." Reno grinned at her before walking off, completely missing her 'you can't be serious' look.

"Finally… Some of us in this company actually have to meet deadlines and be on time." Rufus mock scolded as the three Turks filed into Tseng's office. Rufus smiled after receiving death glares from the redhead and an expected rude gesture.

"Have a big night did we Reno? Can you even remember it?"

No… Unfortunately." Reno replied. "I got so smashed last night I can't even remember if I picked up any hot chicks or not."

"Well." Tseng started, "lets see if you can remember this little spell from last night…" Tseng's eyes turned cold as he picked up the newspaper next to him. "Ahh… Here we are, the media reports; 'Loud, obnoxious, beyond drunk redhead causes a scene at local pub last night. Ring any bells Reno?"

Reno's face fell as tiny pieces from last night came floating back to his memory.

"Oh shit…" He whispered.

"Yes, and there's more on You Tube under 'funny drunk redhead' care to watch?"

"Yeh, actually that'd be pretty cool yo." Tseng clicked the play button and pinched the bridge of his nose as the video of Reno came up, yelling his declaration loud enough for everyone to hear.

" _I'm going to rob a bank tomorrow, dressed as a clown, wearing a thong and nipple tassels. I'll be carrying a goat with a dildo up my arse and a tin of dulux paint. In the bank, the goat is gunna suck me off and I'll throw paint all over the walls while shouting the words_ '_imma eat the biggest fucking pizza you've ever seen yo!' Once I get the cash, I'm gunna shit on the floor and escape in a van shaped like a big pink cock! Lets see the local police reconstruct that fucker ey? I'll see you all there yo!' _

The video stopped playing and Tseng looked up to see Reno on the floor barely breathing and had tears pouring down his face, Rude was shaking with silent laughter and Elena didn't know whether to be horrified or find the whole fiasco highly amusing, Tseng turned to his boss, expecting a lecture, but only found Rufus clicking the 'favourites' box and leaving a comment on the video while laughing,

"R..Reno, that certainly very entertaining, I have one question though," Rufus questioned as he pulled himself together, "Are you actually going to do that?"

"No! of course not, I'd only do that if I was wasted like last night."

"Good. don't ever let me catch you actually doing that. You are all dismissed."

Reno, Rude and Elena nodded their thanks and headed out, but none of the highly trained Turks saw the mischievous glint in Reno's eyes as he mentally made note to buy paint, a clown suit, a van shaped like a cock and a goat, oh! And a video camera so he could record the whole thing.

**FIN **

**Hoped you like it, it took me WAYYYYY to long to get this typed up…. Pls review!**


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